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How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Cartoon Full Text
Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas is my favorite of all the Christmas classics. I love the poem and the cartoon, and over the years I have noticed subtle differences between them. However, while the complete text of the original poem is easily attainable, a transcript of the cartoon special is not.

So I watched the cartoon, with the text of the poem and verses from the songs on hand, in order to provide such a transcript. I organized the poem into rhyming couplets for simplicity. (I also determined that, for the cartoon, dozens of lines were modified, five lines were removed completely, and twenty or so were added.)

If you catch an error or think I missed something, comment below!

Full text of the cartoon special. Enjoy!Collapse )

Trivia Tidbits:

The song "Fahoo Forays" references the last name of the voice actress for Cindy-Lou Who, June Foray.

The thread used to tie the horn to Max's head is red in the poem, black in the cartoon.

In the original poem, the Grinch lives 3,000 feet up Mount Crumpet. In the cartoon, it's 10,000 feet.

Several real-life toy items mentioned in the original poem are replaced by made-up toys in the cartoon.

Thurl Ravenscroft was accidentally uncredited for his singing. Dr. Seuss tried to correct this by sending letters to newspapers across America. Ravenscroft was also the voice of Tony the Tiger.

Meanwhile, Boris Karloff - who did NOT sing the song - won a grammy for his narration of the cartoon when it was released as an LP in 1967.

The illustrated Grinch in the poem was black and white with touches of pink, like every other illustration. Director Chuck Jones (who produced and directed countless Warner Brothers cartoons starring Bugs Bunny and his pals) decided that the cartoon Grinch should be green.
Phone Numbers
The internet is a beautiful thing. I've known how to figure out where a call is coming from based on the number's area code and exchange (or prefix) for quite some time, but until now I've never posted a link to a web site that makes that information easy to find. I'm doing it now mainly because it's useful information, and it's interesting to look at for... two minutes, maybe. also lets you look up international numbers...

On a related note, it's time to get a new phone. I've had an LG 4400 since November 2003, and I I've never had a problem with it, so I'm thinking my next phone will be something similar -- LG flip phone with a sturdy hinge similar to the 4400, but with some of the upgrades one would expect after using the same phone for almost four years. I'm thinking something like an LG 5300 or LG 8700. I don't have a problem with a similar phone manufactured by a different company, but as long as what I have works, why switch?

Bonus: if any current phones can be charged using the LG 4400's chargers, that's what I need!
Laptop Problems ... Help?
The laptop was new in December 2005, and because I inherited it from my dad, it's a Toshiba laptop fitted with a 1.6 GHz Celeron running Windows XP Home -- yeesh. But it's been a good laptop, just good enough that I never bothered to wipe it with a fresh installation of XP Pro. But now may be the time. Before I go through with that, though, I'm wondering if anyone knows of any tricks to revive XP Home after it suddenly chokes under its own weight, passes out, and barely functions when it comes back to...

Everything was working great Monday morning. I attempted to burn a CD, and the first attempt kicked back an error. I re-inserted the CD (because it hadn't been touched) and tried again, but during this time it decided to slow its processing speed to a crawl, so by my estimation it would have taken an hour just to write the data to the image before burning, and I had to leave for work in about 10, so I had to stop the process.

It didn't like that very much, but I didn't realize it was choking until after I did it.

When I booted up after work, several hours later, it took about 7 minutes to get to the desktop (it had taken about 90 seconds for the last 15 months). My first thought was virus/worm/trojan, but after a few cleanup operations, nothing was found or fixed.

Now it's Tuesday morning, and the touchpad stopped loading for a moment, but I fixed that using my selective startup options... but now wireless connectivity has stopped.

So... I haven't had time to really look yet since I actually go to work during the week, but if anyone has seen something like this before and has any suggestions that might keep the laptop functional long enough for me to extract a few gigabites of data (hopefully in fewer than a couple of hours, rather than several days at current processing speeds). I'll be using KNOPPIX tonight

I hope the hard drive isn't failing, but that seems to be a possibility. I like to think that the combination of Celeron and XP Home means the hard drive is fine, though, and I just need to get my data to another machine as quickly as possible so I can format what's left.

KNOPPIX is next...
Crouching Windows, Hidden Taskbar
This is a nifty little tool that I almost put to use this morning to repair a missing taskbar, but instead I discovered a co-worker's computer was setup to use two monitors without a second monitor (which explained the description of a disappearing mouse cursor), so I just disabled the extended desktop.

Taskbar Plus! is still a nifty tool, though.
What were you thinking?

Okay, I laughed. (As far as I know, you shouldn't get in trouble for viewing these web sites at work.)

Thanks for the email, Anna. :)
Science and Stuff
In Brownrig, Montana, the temperature once dropped from 56°F to -44°F in 24 hours -- that's a drop of 100°F!

In Spearfish, South Dakota, the temperature once rose from -4°F to 44°F in two minutes. Two minutes!

Over the course of a full year, temperatures in Eastern Siberia range from about -75°F to 100°F. Wow.

The average temperature on the planet's surface is about 57°F. Without the greenhouse effect, it would be -6°F and the oceans would freeze over. Is that what you want?

Also, there's a theory that the Moon is a result of Earth colliding with another planet a couple of billion years ago, and the Pacific Ocean basin is the hole left by the departing rock.
Grammar Nazi: Lesson 3.1
(Thanks to Jen B for the link.)

(updating a previous topic)
The worst thing about trying to find the THX sound on the internet is finding thousands of teen girls who type "thx" instead of "thanks"... That is all.
Election Results Links
Most of these links are to Elections Divisions or Boards of Elections, but some are just to the offices who run those divisions (but only when a state's elections web site only displays generic voter information and not election results).

If you want to stay ahead of the news networks, come back tomorrow night and check these links again. I will update some of them to link directly to the states' election results pages.

I hope you know your US postal abbreviations; you should by now. (They're arrange alphabetically by states' names, not abbreviations.)

AL | AK | AZ | AR | CA | CO | CT | DE | FL | GA
HI | ID | IL | IN | IA | KS | KY | LA | ME | MD
MA | MI | MN | MS | MO | MT | NE | NV | NH | NJ
NM | NY | NC | ND | OH | OK | OR | PA | RI | SC
SD | TN | TX | UT | VT | VA | WA | WV | WI | WY
DC | AS | GM | MP | PR | VI

DC, American Samoa, Guam, and the Virgin Islands each have delegates in Congress who may vote in committees but not in at-large House votes. Puerto Rico has a non-voting Resident Commissioner who serves as the territory's delegate but who does not vote in committees. The Northern Marianas Islands ("MP" above) has a Resident Representative who, oddly, is elected in odd-numbered years (and currently has no voting rights in Congress). In other words, there are 441 delegates but only 435 Representatives in the House. (The Senate is reserved for the 50 states; DC doesn't even have a Senator, unless you count the Vice President, who isn't officially from DC.)
Opening Works/WordPerfect files in Microsoft Word
College students with Microsoft Word (or with Word Perfect and a USB thumb/flash drive), never again be stuck with a Word Perfect (.WPS) file that can't be opened in Word! If you have Word on your computer, download and install the Works 6.0 Converter for Works and Word Users from

If you have Word Perfect, then download that file and save it to your USB thumb/flash drive if you have one, and you can install the converter onto any omputer with Word if you ever run into that problem again (assuming someone with administrator privileges is logged in at the time).

(Working at a college that's using XP computers for a couple more months, I see this a few times a month, so I thought I'd pass on the good word just in case people who aren't me might benefit from it.)
Grammar Nazi: Lesson 3
It's been over two years since Lesson 2, but I haven't forgotten about it. (And, sadly, I can only find Lesson 1, all the way back in June 2004.)

Lesson 3: How to Use "Less Than" and "Fewer Than" Properly

The rule is actually very simple: user "fewer" if the noun can be counted to a specific number, unless you're talking about time, money, or distance -- and even then, "fewer" is proper, but the linguistic powers that be have given in after decades of the incorrect usage pervading the language. See here.

In other words, you can have less than $20 in your wallet, but you have fewer than 20 one-dollar bills. The first instance references the value of money, while the second references the dollar bill as an object.
USB Coupler/Adapter
I'm looking for a USB female to female coupler to work with my USB extension cable. The cable itself has the default USB tip (type A male, I think) on both ends, so I need the female plug (the receiving end like the ones on your computer) on both ends of the adapter/coupler, one for the device and one for the extension cable.

Where can find one for under $5 without ordering it online? (It isn't worth the shipping charge)
What is the easiest and most cost-effective way to transfer video from VHS to DVD if I don't have the equipment to do it myself?
QUESTION! (flash drive, messenger programs, etc.)
What's the best way to access messenger networks (AIM, MSN, Yahoo) from a flash drive on computers that don't allow you to install the usual software?

Solution so far: Easy Message! Here's a 229KB zip file of version 2.3.663 (it expands to about 560KB) that can be extracted anywhere, including a USB drive.

Once extracted, run em2.exe. (If it's on your computer, you might want to add a shortcut to em2.exe on your Start Menu. The first time Easy Message runs, it will prompt you to setup a local password (security feature!), and then it will prompt you for your messenger account information. The first time it connects, a web ad will popup, but it is easily disabled from the "Options" dialog on the "Tools" menu: just uncheck the "Start Web Panel when application starts" option, and it's gone. (Take note of the other options while you're there.)

Its memory footprint is small, and it's feature-rich for such a small program. And for those unaware of AIM's "Appear Offline" feature, Easy Message lets you use it.
Black Hole vs Stephen Colbert
Our next "Wag Of The Finger" goes to the black hole at the center of our galaxy. Recent research confirms that our galaxy is orbiting a super-massive, star-sucking black hole that's devouring our cosmic neighborhood from the inside out. And I am going on the record as being against this swirling vortex of cosmic nothingness. Shame on you! Wag, wag, wag! Our intelligent designer didn't spend six days working his infinite behind off so you could suck in every piece of matter that crosses your event horizon. Let me tell you something, black hole, you may have swallowed a hundred million suns, but now you're dealing with America. We're not going to get sucked into a super-dense dark mass with a gravitational pull so strong that not even light can escape. We're going to die of Avian Flu. Black hole, you're on notice.
- Stephen Colbert, The Colbert Report, November 8, 2005
Taking a Shower
Clarissa and I had a brief AIM conversation until she decided it was time to take a shower before going to bed. As she was signing off, she raised an interesting point: she knows she's taking a shower, but she can't figure out who or what she's taking it from! (She said it! Not me!)

[Edit: I have been informed, in ways ranging from humorous to downright crude, that this also works with nap, poop, and pee.]


I feel : amused amused
I hear : James Bond soundtracks
☆ ★ ☆ ★ I wanna see stars! ★ ☆ ★ ☆
Okay font gurus, here's one for you.

On every computer I have used and taken the time to notice, the stars above are displayed fine, except my laptop. In fact, all of HTML's special characters display perfectly well except those two stars. Why? What am I missing?

I'm running Windows XP Pro with Office 2003 and gobs of other applications installed. This is really a minor annoyance, but it is still an annoyance, and I'd love to know how to fix it.

Edit: Could not having Wingding fonts installed be it? Edit: Nope, they're there. I bet I know what it is: my system is set to ClearType instead of TrueType, because ClearType renders much better than TrueType on an LCD screen. Edit: Thank goodness that wasn't it, because I like ClearType! It turns out that I didn't have international support turned on in my Office 2003 settings, so I didn't have a proper Unicode font installed. Fixed: So I just changed my install options to add international support, and voila, the proper Unicode fonts are installed ... and I see stars!

Thanks to armelle and all who responded to her post at thequestionclub, and to everyone who responded here!
Whom is on First?
The hitter hits the ball and I want to throw the batter out at first base. So I pick up the ball and throw it to ... Whom?

No, no, no! Who is on first!

. . .

And this is how we have fun with grammar.
Grammar Nazi: Lesson 1
I'm as guilty as you are about this, or it wouldn't be here.

I learned in class yesterday (imagine that! I learned something in class!) that among the most misused words in the English language is "hopefully." What follows is a popular mishap rooted in our misunderstanding of the proper usage of the adverb.

When you say, "hopefully, I will pass this test," you are telling me two things: first, that you will pass this test; second, that you will feel hopeful when you pass the test. Of course, it doesn't make much sense that you feel hopeful upon passing it; you hope to pass the test before and while you take it, not after. By that time, you should be relieved.

When you say, "hopefully, the war will be over soon," you are telling me two things: first, that the war will be over soon; second, that the war will feel hopeful when it is over, which will be soon. Last I checked, though, the war itself does not experience the range of emotions that we do, so this makes very little since.

In each sentence above, "hopefully" was describing the action (modifying the verb) performed by the subject of the sentence. The adverb "hopefully" was applying an emotion felt by the subject, even though it made no sense that a war would feel hopeful, or that you would feel hopeful as you passed the test.

An adverb is meant to modify verbs, adjectives, and other adverbs. What this means, of course, is that we make this mistake all the time, beginning our sentences with improperly placed adverbs.

(The Grammar Nazi will never call you out on your own mistake. Instead, these lessons will be made available for your education and/or amusement. If nothing else, perhaps [not hopefully!] you will consider the information provided here next time this situation arises.)

I feel : amused amused
I hear : Ugly Casanova